A genius and auto-didact scribes:
Dear Uncle Colin,
I see that Morrison, clearly a representative of higher beings sent to grace us with his gorgeous presence, has been apologised unto by a 'music magazine' for allegations made thereunto him. How think you on this?
Yours in awe of your mighty figurine collection and sterling crop of locks,
Anonymous
Uncle Colin advises such and thuslike:
I am always delighted to get such important and thought-provocating messages from people who are clearly on a par with me mentality-speaking.
I do not wish to recount the many times I have seen the hairy-chested giant of pop, and will reserve that for my readers' pleasure on another occasion.
I will say, though, that this man - so unfairly maligned, misrepresented, and abused by the MNE, the Words, his former band-mates in The Smurfs (God rest that beautiful band of brothers), the judge at the royalties trial, the entire reggae industry, and all the others - is nothing less than a God descended to earth in human form.
Who could fail to be stirred by his ripe quiff? His sturdy and inviting musculature? His simpering chops and ambrosaical way with a melody line? The way he removes his jacket whilst he sneers, exposing his self-knit chunky cable-stitch top? The rocking chair? His grandfather's clock? The delicate lace doilies? The poodles? Half a pound of sausages, a packet of Daz, two large aubergines, and a handful of dolly mixtures. And a trout, if you wouldn't mind doing the descaling and top and tailing it for me I'd very grateful?
If only more of us could be like him!
A very good question indeed. More like this please.
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