Great night out

I was asked the other night what my plans were for tonight.

So, see if anyone of you bunch out there can top this:

12.00 noon, into pub, pint of Magners.
12.30pm - Pint of Mangers and a fag.
1.00pm - Pint of Mangers and plate of egg and chips
1.30pm - Pint of Mangers and a fag.
2.00pm - Pint of Mangers and a fag.
2.30pm - Pint of Mangers and a blagged rolly.
3.00pm - Pint of Mangers and two fags.
3.30pm - Pint of Mangers and a fag.
4.00pm - Pint of Mangers and a fag.
4.30pm - Leave pub.
4.35pm - Into another pub, Pint of Mangers

What? No Mangers! Pint of Boomoranje. Cigar.

5.00pm – Pint of Boomoranje and packet of crisps.
5.10pm – Loo break
5.15pm – Leave pub.
5.17pm – Arrive at Club Derrig. Disco! Pint of Mangers. A fag.
6.00pm – Pint of Mangers, Blue WDK. Don’t mind if I do.
6.30pm – Voluntary bar duty. Pint of Mangers. A fag.
7.00pm – Pint of Mangers. Wipe drool off. Suck on a straw.
7.30pm – Pint of Mangers. Go on - have a fag.
8.00pm – Ring laydee and apologise for likely lateness of return. Pint of Mangers. Fag.
8.30pm – Ring laydee and apologise for likely lateness of return. Pint of Mangers. Fag.
9.00pm - Ring laydee and apologise for likely lateness of return. Pint of Mangers. Fag.
9.30pm – Looking at dancers. Pint of Mangers. Fags. Loads of them.
10.00pm – Pint of Mangers. Baileys. Blue DKW. Twenty fags.
10.30pm – Leave Club Derrig.
10.32pm – Enter pub. Pint of Mangers. Plate of chips. Two fags.
11.00pm – Pint of Mangers. Fags.
11.30pm – Pint of Mangers. Fag.
12.00midnight – Leave pub, head for train. Fag.
12.25am – Board train.
1.25am – Wake up in Peterborough. De-train. Fag.
1.30am – Hail minicab.
1.39am – Engage in light-hearted fracas with minicab driver.
1.40am – Abandon cab somewhere that looks like New Southgate.
1.41am - 4.40am - Amble about for 3 hours. Fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag, fag. Two fags.
4.40am – Hail minicab.
4.42am – Get out at rail station. Lost me fags.
4.44am – Board train.
6.00am – Arrive home. Wake up laydee, tell her all my adventures through medium of gestures and facial expressions.

My only concern is that I may have been beaten to it.