It's not everyone that can get away with a hat this gorgeous, and I am no exception.
But as you can see this particular chapeau - when worn having consumed a yard of cassis and white wine - had a dramatic and dismal effect on my mood.
I put it down to the grim item of headgear being manufactured by a hatter who practised the dark arts.
I shall only wear the dreaded titfer on ceremonial occasions, when gravitas must be maintained at all costs and it is necessary to resist the childish japes and prankery of my civil partner-to-be 'Mr' 'Benjamin' 'Thomas'.
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