O, the ignominy!There was I, soaking in the culture of an episode of Smartarses on the Club Derrig TV when I was called upon to shift my "lardy butt" by Tallulah, and erect something enticing, warm, and colourful.
Without the aid of safety clothing apparel or any kind of protective headgear, I leapt upon a chair and raised my arms just to the right height that my Kalvin Clein's waistband was exposed.
A titter ran round the room as my hero - Sir Frankie Howerd - was wont to declare.
All-in-all a festive display of gargantuan proportionality.
Nice decs, too.
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